Til Death Do Us Part
by Chaotic.Horizon
Summary: Ever since her youth, loss has been something Ashe has always known. She's had to watch as the world around her dies. Now, Dalmasca has fallen. Taking on the facade of Amalia, Ashe is losing the only person she has left— herself. Pre-game. AshexRasler.
1. Sanctuary

**So, as I'm sure you can see, I've started a new story! My other one is still a work-in-progress, but it unfortunately got put into a bit of a hiatus. Mostly because I was given the task to try and write a 50,000 word story in a month. I... only got halfway, heh. However, I liked the story I got and decided I might as well post it up here and try to finish. Hopefully you guys will like it too!**

**This story is basically my take on Ashe's past, and how she became the person she was at the beginning of the game. I hope that I've achieved my goal of perhaps better explaining a reason for her sort of cold nature when she first met the other characters. But I don't know, you tell me? **

**Before you start reading the actual story, one more thing: I don't own Final Fantasy XII or anything associated with it. All I own is the main plot, and my own original characters.**

* * *

**Chapter One - Sanctuary**

Small spaces always made her nervous. It made her feel like the walls were slowly coming together, trapping her within. However, it wasn't as though one could blame her for feeling this way. Take anyone who had experienced nothing but large, spacious rooms their entire life, and place them somewhere no bigger than a closet? It's not unexpected that some previously undiscovered claustrophobia may make itself known. The lifeless gray walls and thin gleams of moonlight through the small barred window certainly did not help the situation. The sensation of being confined in a prison cell only heightened her anxiety.

Her eyes, a washed out bluish gray, seemed to be staring_ through_ the ceiling above her. She had been lying across her cot, nearly unblinking, for the past hour. Having feigned exhaustion in order to retreat to her cramped living quarters, she was sure not to make a sound. The room itself was silent aside from her breathing, but a muted roar of sound came from beyond the walls. It was early yet in the evening, and the others staying with her were all still active. She was in the company of good people, she knew. However, even though the claustrophobic thoughts certainly didn't help soothe her mind, the fact she was alone gave her some feeling of sanctuary. She simply didn't wish to deal with the organized chaos around her anymore for the night.

"Your Majesty?"

The fair-haired Princess didn't react at all to the gruff voice outside her door. She already knew who it was, so no effort was made to answer him. Ashelia—or _Amalia_, as she would now be called—was perfectly content with having him assume she was asleep. She thought Vossler a confidant who she could look to, yes, but the current circumstances dictated that it was best she not speak to him for a while. It had only been an hour and a half or so since she had gone through a bit of a breakdown, taking out the brunt of her frustration on General Azelas. She was sorry for doing so, but she hadn't gone and actually apologized. Honestly, she was surprised that he was even trying to speak to her so soon after the fact.

Ashe waited in silence as the loyal knight stood outside, and a soft sigh escaped her lips once she heard the distinct _clink_ of his armor as he walked away. He would return later on, she was sure. For now, the seventeen-year-old was simply glad that she would be left in peace. There was too much to worry about; too much weight on her shoulders. It had come to the point that—while perhaps not the first time it had happened in her life, but without a doubt it was the first time it had been so severe, so _crippling_—Ashelia was beginning to feel like she was folding under the pressure. Her mind was plagued with all sorts of ill thoughts, and nothing she could do would make them go away. She was in a state of distress; so many emotions she had kept deep within were finally breaking through—destroying, more obliterating, really—the wall she had constructed so carefully.

She was supposed to be dead. Her uncle, the Marquis Ondore of Bhujerba, was responsible for the announcement of her death. He had told all of Ivalice that the poor Princess of Dalmasca, stricken with grief for her family and the fall of her country, had taken her own life. From what she had been told by others, the entire world was under the assumption that she was dead, poisoned at her own hand. Obviously, this was not exactly the truth as Ashe lay there, still breathing, her heart still beating steadily. Physically dead she may not have been, but her mental state was beginning to deteriorate to that of a near corpse.

Suicide? A thought that once would have seemed farfetched was rapidly becoming not so to the blonde young woman, as time passed by with irritating slowness. It was now becoming increasingly difficult to keep herself strong and in control. She had been forced into this completely new environment so suddenly, her life changing in a very short period of time. Nearly everyone she had ever loved was dead and gone. She had been wholly betrayed by someone who she had trusted. Her life was beginning to self destruct, and yet she had no choice but to take on this new life as Amalia—a strong leader who would not; _could _not let her emotions obstruct the end goal. It was all so much to take in. The more she mused on her current circumstances, the more tempted she became to make her uncle's announcement a fact, instead of merely a political tactic.

Thinking of her Uncle Halim caused her to remember his sister, her own mother. The Queen had been a source of hope for Dalmasca, she remembered. Even though Ashelia had been quite young when her mother was alive, she still knew just how much her mother had affected the atmosphere of the palace, as well as all of Dalmasca. Her Royal Majesty Queen Azra had been a fixture in Ivalice, both a charismatic celebrity_ and_ an important part of Dalmasca's political structure. Though of course Ashe did not realize this as a child, in her later years she looked at records and found her mother to have been much more than a figurehead Queen. The Bhujerban-born woman had been ready and willing to assist her husband in his decisions, and had always been well informed on the happenings of Ivalice.

She was the sort of Queen that Ashe could only dream of becoming some day. It was one of her greatest hopes, but at this point her optimism towards achieving such was not so high. She may have had the blood of royalty running through her veins, but her throne had been taken away. Ashelia had no way of reclaiming it now, the announcement of her faux suicide hindering any ability to go back to the palace which had been essentially conquered by the Empire. If she were to try and take back what was rightfully hers, she would only be met with opposition and doubt that she was truly who she claimed to be. It was an issue, but for now it was one that would remain unimportant. Ashe needed to be working with her group, the Resistance, to break the empire's hold over Ivalice. Anything that could further complicate things would be left for much later on, when they had made more progress.

Sighing, Ashe let her eyes close as she pondered just what her mother would have thought of this entire situation if she were still here. The Queen had always been an advocate for peace, part of the inspiration for Ashe's own beliefs. She was sure that Azra wouldn't have been happy to see how the war had destroyed so many lives. She was also positive that her mother would have done her best to see that Ivalice could look to the horizon. If only she were there to help...The Resistance leader could remember so clearly the last time she had ever seen her mother alive; a seemingly normal day when she was only six years old.

_"There is something wrong with Her Royal Majesty?" _

_"Apparently she is quite ill, bedridden completely."_

_"Do they know what ails her?"_

_"Aye, they think it might be the plague."_

_"The plague! The plague is returning?"_

_"The healers are considering the possibility."_

_"What misfortune! May the Light keep our Queen safe."_

_"Yes, Dalmasca would be heartbroken if anything befell her."_

_As the two guards conversed in front of the Queen's quarters, they hardly noticed the small figure silently watching them from a few yards away. They had no idea that the palace's youngest royal was out of her bedroom and had been slinking around the ornate halls. The girl was only a mere six years old at the time, but her skill in escaping the watchful eyes of the guards was no less clever. She enjoyed observing the palace's inner workings from the shadows, her youthful energy apparent in the way she skipped and frolicked through the halls. Her parents did not condone her rambunctious attitude, but there was not much they could do to stop young Ashelia from going on her little adventures._

_Peering carefully around a corner, the small blonde child watched the men speak, their words incoherent due to the distance. She wondered what they were going on about, and if it had anything to do with what she had seen earlier. When Ashe had been out in the main hall, it seemed as though the entire palace was in some kind of panic. People were rushing around like busy bees, the energy even more frantic than was usual on the average day. The girl was very much used to seeing strangers walking around her extravagant home, but today seemed different. Tilting her head to one side in curiosity, the young Princess noticed people going in and out of the royal bedroom. That in itself was normal, servants often tending on the King and Queen when they were in bed. However, the sense of urgency was obvious enough that even Ashe understood._

_It was odd, all this commotion, but it didn't deter her in wanting to complete her mission. Ashe had just gotten a haircut, courtesy of the royal barber, and was eager to show her mother. Waiting for the doors to open as someone was walking out, the Princess rushed over to the bedroom. "Princess, wait! Stop!" The two knights called out, attempting to stop the girl from entering. Ignoring the cries of the guards, Ashe simply dodged their advances and ran over to her mother, jumping onto the Queen's bed. "Mother! Mother, look!" The young girl said, shaking awake the slumbering woman; she was much too excited to notice how pale and exhausted her mother appeared. "Hmm?" The dark haired woman replied, gray eyes fluttering open to see the young girl smiling enthusiastically._

_"Mother, see, I cut my hair so it looks just like yours!" Ashe exclaimed proudly to the Queen, running a small hand through her cropped hair. Rather than having her blonde locks reach past her shoulders, the young Princess now sported a distinct bob, her hair only falling to her chin. She had always admired her mother's own daring hairstyle, one that had made the Queen recognizable. It was unusual for a woman of royalty to have shorter hair, as long locks were prized for their femininity. Perhaps the Queen's decision to keep her hair this way was an act of rebellion against the norm...waiting for a response, the young girl was anxious to know if her mother approved._

_"Oh, did you, dear?" The Bhujerban-born woman replied in an absentminded tone, straightening herself up into a sitting position on the bed. Once she finally got a good look at her young daughter, a warm smile appeared on the Queen's refined features. "How lovely you look, Ashelia!" Turning her head to cough suddenly, Queen Azra's smile faltered for a moment before she regained her composure. "Have you—" She paused to cough again "—shown your father?" Her voice sounded strained, Ashe noticed; not strong and sure like it usually did. Her mother had such a pretty voice, she thought. The Queen's Bhujerban accent was noticeable, but she had been working on sounding as Dalmascan as possible. This in itself caused a unique blend to come through in her speaking, and Ashe would recognize her mother's voice among a million others. She also recognized when the Queen sounded sick, as she certainly did then. _

_"Mother, are you ill?" Ashe asked, ignoring her mother's previous question and crawling over to place a hand against the tanned woman's forehead. It was all for naught, really, as the little girl had no idea how to feel for a fever—she was simply mimicking what she had seen done around her. Azra felt endeared and smiled again at this, placing her own hand over her daughter's. "It is only a small ailment, sneha," she replied softly, reverting to her native language as she often did in affection. _

_"Highness, would you like us to remove her? Perhaps the Princess should not be in such close contact with you."_

_At this, they turned their attention to one of the guards who had just entered the room, perhaps finally deciding it was best to intervene. The King had previously ordered them to make sure none of the royal children were to become infected with whatever illness had claimed the Queen. They were inclined to listen, as poor Raminas was racked with worry about his wife and the rest of his family. The loyal men wanted to be sure they fulfilled their duty to the best of their ability. Queen Azra was very well aware of this, but she shook her head in response. "It is fine, there is no need. You may wait outside, men. I shall send her out shortly." _

_"As you wish, Majesty," the other guard replied, and the two men bowed deeply at their Queen before leaving her quarters, shutting the doors behind them. Ashe watched after them silently, a look of distaste on her features. She never liked it when the guards would speak to others as though she were not standing right there. The nerve they had! She really ought to send them off to the dungeon. In fact, the girl was about to ask if her mother could make this possible when the Queen went into a fit of violent coughing. Azra fell back onto the pillows in exhaustion, looking quite miserable as she attempted to regulate her breathing. The young Princess frowned deeply at this, upset at her mother's condition. "You __**are**__ ill..."_

_The Queen sighed, knowing that her daughter was clever in her youth and would not easily be convinced of something that was not the truth. "Come here." Pulling her daughter over into a hug, Azra ran her hand over the girl's short blonde hair. "You need not worry, Ashelia." The young girl could hear her mother's heavy, struggling breaths. "I will be better soon, alright? I may just need to stay here, in bed, for a while." The gray-eyed woman was patient in the way she spoke, a perfectly mothering tone. Holding her daughter close, she had no fear of passing on her sickness. If it was indeed what she suspected, Azra knew that by then she would have been far past the contagious stages. Reassuring in itself, but also this was a cause for anxiety, considering what tended to follow..._

_"I cannot visit you anymore?" Ashe asked, her voice making it clear that this thought brought her to the verge of tears. She held tightly onto her mother, smelling her sweet (and certainly expensive) perfume. "It will only be for a short time, vastaa." She said in a soft, reassuring tone. "You will be fine, yes? You have the love of your father to keep you company. As well as your brothers. Everyone around you will be there to protect you and make sure you are not lonely... Most of all, you will have __**my **__love as well...that will never change." Kissing her daughter on the forehead, Queen Azra ended the hug and spoke again, "Do not frown so, dear. Your smile suits you much better."_

_Noting that the guards surely would soon return to see what was holding them up, the Queen inwardly sighed. "You should be off now, Ashelia. Your father has expressed sadness that he has not seen you lately. You would do well to go visit him." At this Ashe nodded reluctantly, still not happy at the fact she was being sent off from her mother so quickly. It happened too often, due to her parents often having important duties to tend to, but it was no less upsetting to her. "Fine, I will, but l wish to come back here later." She replied, the stubborn nature of most children her age shining through. Her mother smiled at this, patting the girl on the head before helping her off the high bed. "Off with you now," the Queen said with a light laugh. "You should show the whole palace your haircut. You look as lovely as a Galbana Lily." _

_"Thank you, mother!" Ashe called as she made her way out of the royal bedroom, a smile on her face as she waved goodbye. Once she was standing at the large double doors, the young blonde girl turned back around and stared meaningfully at her sickly mother. "You will get better, right? Promise?" The Queen seemed surprised at her daughter's words at first, but smiled weakly after a moment._

_"Yes, Ashelia. I promise."_

Her mother had always known that she was going to die. The Queen had suspected that it_ was_ the Plague that had gotten to her, and she was calculating in how she went about her final days. Only a week after Ashe had left her alone in her bedroom, she was gone...Ashe had no doubt that those words, the last words she had ever heard from her mother, were chosen carefully. They truly meant something, though it took years of maturing for the blonde Princess to realize. Queen Azra wanted her child to know that she was loved, and that she would continue being loved, for all her days. It was bittersweet, a memory that was now causing more pain than comfort. Ashelia could feel tears threatening to fall, her mother's voice ringing in her ears.

Turning her head to the side, Ashe finally opened her eyes again and moved her stare over to the gleaming object sitting on the wooden night stand. She knew exactly what it was, despite the near black darkness obscuring its identity. It was her dagger, which she had placed there weeks ago when she was first taken away from the palace. It was mostly meant for protection, in case the Resistance's base was infiltrated by Empire forces. It wouldn't do much, of course, but only a fool would have remained unarmed. However, now as she gazed almost longingly at the glimmering silver metal, another purpose completely came to mind. It would have been so incredibly simple to grab it and...

Ashe squeezed her eyes shut again and forcibly turned her head in the other direction. It was wrong of her to think this way. The late Queen of Dalmasca wouldn't have wanted her daughter to resort to such drastic measures. In fact, she could almost hear her mother's distinct voice advising her to think before she acted. _You have much more to live for, Ashelia dear. _And yet, it still seemed so easy. So easy to have a way out of all this trouble, all this stress, all this pain.

Slowly the sounds of activity within the Resistance headquarters began to die down, and through the crack underneath her door Ashe could see the lights going out. The day was over for this ragtag group of insurgents (as they were often referred to as, much to the chagrin of the Princess). Tomorrow they would start again, gathering information and doing all the other things necessary to begin fighting back. They were yet in the beginning stages of planning, but their ambitions were grand. Ashelia was proud of what they had achieved so far, and what they wished to do in the future. However, it did not change the fact that once Ashe was done with being the leader, when the long day was finally over; she would find herself slowly losing hope. Every day that passed by allowed her negative feelings to continue growing, festering and digging beneath her skin. She could feel it happening, and she _did _try to deter such depression, but there seemed to be no use.

_I should try to sleep, _she thought, knowing that most of her physical energy had been completely used up at that point. However, her mental state dictated that she would not be getting much slumber anytime soon. It was going to be a very long night, she could already tell.

**

* * *

**

**In Sanskrit, which from what I've gathered is the equivalent to the Bhujerban language:**

_**sneha = love**_

_**vastaa = child **_

**Anyway, hope you enjoyed the first chapter! People will probably find it more interesting as it goes on, this is more just a chapter to get into things. I've written quite a bit of this story already, so hopefully updating shouldn't be a problem. Yay! Though I'll tell you, awesome reviews would definitely make me update faster. Just sayin'.**


	2. Our Fates Align

**So, as you can probably tell I'm really bad at uploading on time. I'm very forgetful, so I let myself become distracted by other things in life. Sorry to anyone who is still actually interested in this fanfic (or my other one which I am also procrastinating)! I hope I haven't lost you all. I'll try to be better, kay? Wish me luck on that...**

**As always, I do not in any way own Final Fantasy XII, nor will I ever. **

* * *

**Chapter Two - Our Fates Align**

Despite how exhausted the Dalmascan girl's physical body was, she found she could not shut down her mental functions and get some sleep. Every time that she would try, a thought would come to mind and distract her. Honestly, she was well aware that she would not be able to rest until her mind was at ease, but that did not make it any less difficult to achieve. And so, unable to do anything else, she stared into the darkness of her cell-like room, wondering just how she had managed to get herself into such a situation. Of course, she _did _know how she ended up there, but the young woman thought about it more deeply than the actual timeline of events that took place.

Though Ashe tried to move her train of thought away from it, no matter what she did the memory of her mother kept returning. Ashelia may not have spent even half of her life with the late Queen, but the times that she did have were constantly replaying in her mind. At that point the only thing she _could_ think about was the vivid recollection of her mother's funeral—one among many she would experience in her seventeen years. It had been so many years ago, and Ashe had been so young at the time, but she still remembered certain things about the event that she was sure would never be forgotten.

_The funeral of Queen Azra had been quite the event; an entire country of grieving citizens there to watch the procession. Due to the fact that she had been such a popular figure, it was given that her death would be something that had such a great effect on the morale and spirit of the people. Her Royal Majesty had been a sort of light of Dalmasca, someone who they could use as a vessel for hope. Hope for peace, hope for a better tomorrow; all the things they wished for, they could see in their beloved Queen. When she had been taken by the Plague, the country lost something that they had taken for granted. It was clear that this was the truth in how the country came together to mourn Her Royal Majesty._

_Of course, all of the royal family Dalmasca was in attendance, as well as other more distant relatives. Family members whom Ashelia had never even laid eyes upon before were there, the cathedral seats for the private funeral full to the brim. There had also been a public viewing of the body, but afterwards only by invitation could one attend the actual service. Among the guest list, along with the previously mentioned relatives, were other royal and political figures from all throughout Ivalice. Despite the fact that they were warring at the time, leaders from both Rozarria and Archadia were there to pay their respects. A solemn affair it was, all of these significant people gathered together to say their final goodbyes to the late Queen. King Raminas had even expressed some mild surprise at the sheer volume of those who had wished to attend._

_Having a seat in one of the first pews, Ashelia sat quietly alongside her eight older brothers. For such a young child, Ashe was well aware of what proper conduct was at such an event. Though she of course was extremely emotional, the little girl did not weep loudly or make any sort of scene during the prayers and eulogy. Instead, the six year old child was quite somber as she let her mind wander—it was much easier for her to pretend that she was somewhere else completely. When she finally allowed her attention to be brought back to the actual funeral, Ashe found herself tearing up, but not at all hysterical. Her brother Halim (named after her uncle), only seven at the time and the youngest Prince of Dalmasca, was quick to take notice of this, and offered his shoulder for her to rest her head on, though the girl politely rejected the proffered shoulder._

_Staring at the stained glass windows, the blonde girl began to wonder just what her older brother was thinking then. He was her only fully related brother of the eight she had, meaning that Azra had been his birth mother as well. He was calm as he sat; a slight change from his usual enthusiastic and mischievous persona. Perhaps the boy was experiencing the same type of pain that Ashe was. The Queen had loved all the royal children like her own, and Ashe was sure that her other brothers were just as devastated, but there was part of her that thought they couldn't have understood what she was feeling like Halim did. Even though she was quite curious to know, Ashe never asked Halim out loud just how the death of their mother had affected him. She simply didn't have the courage to ask after the funeral was over, not wanting to bring up potentially touchy subjects..._

_Though the service seemed like it went on for hours and hours to young Ashe, in reality it was only about an hour and a half before everyone in the cathedral began slowly filing out. The girl could hear people whispering softly as they left, perhaps reminiscing about her mother (or complaining about the lengthy service, though she hoped it was the former). As the pews emptied, Ashe and the more close loved ones of the Queen remained for a while longer, a sober silence filling the cathedral once more when the majority of the crowd had left. Looking around absentmindedly, Ashelia could see her Uncle Halim in the pew across the aisle, his head bowed as he seemed to be in deep meditation, or perhaps prayer. Azra had been his younger sister, Ashe knew, so it was no surprise that he was there to grieve. She had seen him discussing something with her father before the service had started, but they had been too far away for her to catch their words._

_Eventually, Ashelia watched her father and uncle leave the cathedral, along with the others who had stayed longer. Despite how they may have wanted to continue paying their respects, none of them could stay there forever. Even with her family bidding their goodbyes Ashelia chose to stay seated in the pews. Her brothers had left along with her father, but she didn't follow and soon enough Ashe was the only one left, besides the few Holy men. No one had seemed to notice this, or they simply didn't mind, as she wasn't asked to leave. Perhaps they understood that she was not ready to leave her mother's presence just yet. The young girl's gray-eyed gaze wandered over to the pulpit, and she stared at the platform on which she knew her mother lay, colorful flowers all about her. _

_When she had been given the choice to see her mother's body earlier in the day, Ashe was quick to decline. Honestly, she didn't need to see the body to know how the late Queen looked, lying there peacefully. Ashe could only guess that she was just as pretty, with her dark hair and tanned skin, though her lively glow was surely gone. The girl deemed it as better that her last memory of her mother's appearance be one during her life, and not as she lied there in death. A decision with quite a bit of depth for a young child, but the Dalmascan Princess had always been very aware, even in youth. In fact, this awareness was what had let her know that she should wait until the cathedral was empty before letting her emotions show, and she did just this. Once the Holy men went into the cathedral's back rooms, Ashe could almost immediately feel herself being overcome._

_As the young girl began to cry, she didn't notice the echo of light footsteps coming from the outer hall. It wasn't until she felt the distinct sensation of being watched that she turned around to see someone walking down the aisle towards her. Wiping at her cheeks in an attempt to seem composed, the Princess saw that it was a boy, hardly older than she was by the looks of it. He was a fair-haired lad, though this was not exactly a rarity in Dalmasca. It seemed like everywhere you turned someone sported the signature ashy blonde hair. In fact, the only place in Dalmasca where there was any real variation was within the royal family itself. However, something about him clued her in that he wasn't from Dalmasca at all. The platinum tone to his short hair reminded her of somewhere else, though she couldn't put a finger on it._

_"Who are you...?" Ashe asked, hoping that she didn't sound as tearful as she probably looked at that moment. The boy did not answer her at first, waiting until he was standing right next to her pew, his clear blue eyes seeming to examine her thoughtfully. "Rasler," he replied simply. "Are you alright? You were crying..." This in itself caught Ashe a bit off guard, as the girl hadn't expected to be asked this. Wasn't it obvious enough? Of course, he probably meant it less a question and more as a way to get her to talk to him. Silent for a while, the girl partly wanted to just say that she was fine, but the fact that she was beginning to tear up again probably would have hinted otherwise. Sniffling, Ashe shook her head, avoiding eye contact with the boy and staring at the ground. Again there was no sound to be heard in the cathedral until Rasler finally decided to speak again, his voice sympathetic and soft. "You knew the Queen?"_

_Ashe nodded at this, her voice breaking as she told him that she was her mother. He seemed understanding at this, looking as though he didn't judge her at all for her emotions. "Oh, I'm sorry..." The boy apologized, a slight frown forming on his young features. This got no reaction from the Princess, as tears continued to fall. Perhaps it could be considered a bit of an awkward silence, but Ashe barely noticed at all. When Rasler spoke once more she finally looked up at him, wondering why he hadn't given up on the conversation yet. "I understand why you're sad. I lost my mother too...a few years ago. I don't remember her very well, but I know how you feel. You probably want to be alone." With that the boy began to walk away slowly, only to be called back before he was more than a few feet away._

_"Rasler, wait. You don't have to go," Ashe said in a low voice, moving from the edge of the pew so there would be room for him to sit. Honestly, the young girl wasn't sure why she did this. She had never met this boy in her entire life and she was going to ask him to sit with her as she mourned her mother? The Princess didn't understand her own actions, but once it was done she could do little to take it back. This was especially so when he took her offer and sat, not looking at her but over to the decorated platform. Allowing her own gaze to follow, they sat in silence for a while as they stared towards the late Queen in her rest, Ashe sometimes pausing to wipe away tears._

_Eventually the two children began to speak to each other, Rasler gently asking Ashe to tell him about the Queen and how she had been in life. Ashe found that it was indeed helpful to talk about her mother, though she wondered again why this boy even bothered. Why did it matter to him? It made no sense that he stayed for so long. Still, she couldn't sum up the courage to actually ask him, instead quietly enjoying his presence as though he was a good friend. It was only when the echoing sound of many footsteps came to them that they stopped their conversation. More than one person coming, they could tell, and soon enough a voice shouted through the cathedral._

_"Prince Rasler! Where have you gone?"_

_Ashe's gray eyes widened at this, never having thought about the possibility that the boy in front of her was royalty as well. What kingdom was he a prince of? Some far-off land? Maybe he was from nearby? If not, would she ever see him again? All such questions begged to be asked, but the girl only looked curiously towards Rasler as a somewhat embarrassed expression crossed his face. "I'm sorry, I should get going. It was nice meeting you. Maybe I'll see you again?" Smiling at her, the boy quickly got up from his seat and bowed at her (yes, clearly royalty), then jogged over to the exit that led into the hallway. Once at the doorway, he turned back to wave at her before running out. Waving back, Ashe realized once he was gone that she had never even told him her name..._

It pained Ashe to remember the first time she had met Rasler, the one who would become her other half later on. Her six-year-old self could not have fathomed at all that the boy she met on a whim at her mother's funeral would end up becoming the best friend she'd ever had. An understatement, all things considered, but generally the truth. Was it an act of fate that they met that day? Perhaps it was, but even if not, Princess Ashelia was quite grateful to have met her Prince. If she hadn't, she was sure her life, despite its hardships, would not have been as rewarding. He really did make a difference, and Ashe knew very well not to take the times they'd had together for granted. It was especially true now, as those times were officially over.

Sometimes, the Princess wished she could go back in time to grasp at those treasured memories, holding them close to her and never letting them go. It was impossible, however; she had come to realize such a thing rather quickly. So, instead she would need to depend on her mind's ability to bring her back to those days in the past. A photographic memory Ashe did not possess, but the events that mattered most always seemed to stay engraved in her mind. Even if anyone else would consider them trivial, the memories she kept were of great importance to her, and her alone. It was the one thing that the fates could not take away from her, despite how they tried with everything else.

Out of habit she began to twist at the silver wedding band upon her left hand, trying to see its gleam in the dim moonlight. Its twin was on her other hand, and the two rings together meant more to her than any other royal treasure that could be found in the palace. The rings themselves were not ornate, simple bands with a bright blue sheen to them. In fact, it may have been surprising to see a royal wedding signified by rings so lacking in value when compared to other trinkets and treasures under their possession. However, their simplicity only lent them even more meaning to Ashe—the simple purity of love. Those two rings meant more than any value someone would put on them, more than any gem or precious metal.

As she listened to the peaceful silence surrounding her, Ashelia wondered if anyone else in her company was experiencing the trouble sleeping that she was. If someone was indeed still awake, staring at their ceiling just as she did, it would not at all be a surprise to her. With all the stress that had been put upon them in the past few weeks, the Resistance was surely a very good place to find insomniacs. They all had to be on the top of their game at all times, making plans and getting ready to start their fight to regain the freedom they had lost to the Empire. It was all so much weight to bear, especially when they fought not only for their own beliefs but to ensure peace for all of Ivalice—a heavy order considering the years and years of war that had plagued the land. Was what they were attempting even possible?

Ashe wondered about that very question more than she would have liked, though she confided in no one about her doubts. Though the young woman felt she could certainly trust someone like General Azelas with such thoughts, part of her thought it better to keep them to herself. She couldn't imagine what the valiant knight would think of her if she were to make it known that she was less than one hundred percent optimistic. Ashelia was supposed to be the hopeful Princess, after all. It was her duty to lead the Resistance in their mission and to encourage them that a new horizon was in sight. If anyone in their group was to express doubts about what they were doing, it definitely should not have been the person in charge of it all. It wasn't something she was proud of.

By that point Ashe could feel herself falling asleep, her eyes weighed down by some strong, invisible force. Earlier she would have welcomed slumber readily, but now she was too caught up in scattered thoughts and memories. Forcing her gray eyes to remain opened, she wondered what certain people would think if they could see her now, lying in the dark with thoughts of hopelessness and surrender on her mind. Part of her was glad they were not there to know, but the majority of her spirit longed for the comfort from those she had lost. She would have given anything to see her father's kind eyes, hear her mother's delicate voice, or Rasler...he was the one she felt as though she needed the most, at that moment. Perhaps he could have rescued her from her personal crisis.

It was her duty to save Dalmasca, to do her very best in order to save all of Ivalice from the perils of war. The Dalmascan girl needed to be strong and true, make brave decisions and never back down. Under this new alias of hers, Amalia, she was meant to become someone who was more than a dainty Princess. She had chosen her mother's middle name as her new identity for a reason, so it could inspire her to seek peace no matter what the cost to herself. Weeks ago when her life had changed so suddenly, Ashe could have never guessed that losing everything she was would be one of the consequences. In being true to her new duty, her hope was nearly gone; her lively spirit dwindled to the point where she needed to wind herself up just to operate.

_Amalia_'s job was to save everyone and yet... she felt like she was the one who needed to be saved.

* * *

**And so ends Chapter 2! Hopefully Chapter 3 will not take several months to upload, heh. It probably won't- I'm trying to get better at not procrastinating things. Inspiration would be nice, though. Do you know what's reeeaally inspiring? Reviews. So you should write one! It'd make me happy. **


	3. A Face in the Crowd

**I'm baaack~ With a more punctual update this time!  
**

**Thank you sooo much to feignedheart for such a wonderful review! It seriously made my day, like you don't even know. It means a lot, as cheesy as that is. So yes, thank youu~ If I got more reviews like that I'd probably keep writing 24/7, hah. Get on it, people! I award feignedheart and Katreda cookies for doing so. Don't you want cookies too? You do, so review.**

**Anyway, do I own Final Fantasy XII yet? No? Oh. Guess not.**

* * *

**Chapter Three - A Face in the Crowd**

As the night wore on, Ashe had no idea how long she had been lying there in the darkness. She could only estimate that an hour or two had gone by, at least. Really, the princess had never been very skilled in figuring out time, though she still managed to be quite a punctual individual, mainly because she relied on clocks to know how fast or slow time was going. Not that it really mattered at that moment, as long as everyone else was in bed and therefore were not going to try and speak to her. Ashe had never been an anti-social person, especially considering her upbringing, but the last thing she wanted was to have to have a conversation with one of the Resistance members while she was in the middle of some sort of mental breakdown.

Continuing to fiddle with her wedding band, Ashe still wished that Rasler was there to offer his support. He had always been able to calm her down when she was in distress; whenever she had needed him he had been there, for as long as she could remember. The princess never even had to call for him—it was as though he'd had some innate sense to come comfort her if something had gone wrong. It was strange now, that he couldn't do that anymore. She was so used to being able to lean on him when she needed to. As she lay on her bed, part of her—a minuscule section of her subconscious—kept expecting him to knock on her door. That part of her waited anxiously, holding her breath, only to soon realize that it was hopeless. The knock never came, and it never would. It just wasn't like it used to be anymore...

After the day of her mother's funeral, it was not until a year later that she would see Prince Rasler again. Though the royal figures throughout Ivalice met on a fairly regular basis, it took an elaborate, grand sort of event for the children of nobility to be together in the same place for extended periods of time. Such an example would be a large gala, just like the one that was held for her oldest brother Raminas II, on his seventeenth birthday. It seemed as though anyone who was anybody in Ivalice was on the guest list, especially, of course, the royalty. Unlike her older brothers, Ashelia had never been made to meet important political figures; had never been forced to associate. It was really the first time she would interact with them, and it was sure to be an interesting experience.

_Dressed in a pale blue gown, the little girl looked quite presentable with a white bow in her hair and a gemstone necklace that perfectly matched her dress. She had always hated having to dress up so much, for as long as she could remember. Honestly she was formally dressed at all times of the day excepting when she went to bed, and Ashe was well used to that. However, at a special event she was always made to go above and beyond the normal requirements. As she pulled at her puffy sleeves in irritation, she very much wished that she could go back to her less extravagant day dress. She liked it much better, and it was certainly a lot less of a hassle. _

_Sighing as she sat with her family at the head table, Ashe found herself rather bored as she watched various nobles be announced and then allowed through the main doors. She never quite understood why they needed to __**announce**__ just who was coming through the doorway. Couldn't they just see who it was? It seemed so unnecessary to her, and if she didn't know any better, the young girl would have certainly made her opinion well known. However, she realized that this was just the way of things and didn't question it—at least not out loud. Instead she observed in silence, examining the well dressed people who entered. Every now and then she would feel a nudge to her side, her brother Halim trying to catch her attention when a particularly over-dressed individual entered the ballroom. She had to cover her mouth to hide the giggles at the outrageously high collars and over the top bedazzlement._

_"Look at that one, Ashe! Her hat has an entire chocobo's worth of feathers!" _

_"How do you think she keeps that thing on her head?"_

_"Maybe it's glued in place."_

_"Will you two quiet down?" The last statement was made by Abram, who was sitting by them; another of Ashe's older brothers. Five years her senior, the adolescent was quick to correct his younger siblings, despite the fact that he was the fourth youngest Dalmascan prince himself. The smaller ones never really obeyed his orders though, as exhibited by Halim then sticking out his tongue at his brother in a very un-princely manner. Ashe on the other hand knew that he was serious this time, as he__** always **__meant it if he looked up from his reading. It was rather difficult to turn Abram's attention away from a captivating book. Really, only her brother would bring along a book to a party, ready and willing to ignore everyone else and be drawn into the story. Usually their father tried to advise him otherwise, but Abram was very much hopeless in this respect. There had not been a gathering yet that hadn't had one of his books apparently added to the guest list. Spying at the book's spine, Ashe saw the title, indicating that he was reading fairy tales; just another of the many genres in his repertoire._

_Once Abram's attention was brought back down to the words on the page, Halim sent his brother a quick glare with his lively brown eyes. However after a moment he merely continued on with his commentary, though he was mindful to speak in a whisper so it wouldn't bother their intellectual sibling. Only half listening at this point, Ashe glanced around the large ballroom, taking in all the people and activity. Spying her eldest brother across the room, she watched as he seemed to be in a deep conversation with some foreign political figure. Raminas II bore a startling resemblance to his father at times, especially when he was in his mode of seriousness regarding important subjects. Though barely a man he was tall and of strong build, his mane of dark blond hair and sky blue eyes giving him a certain presence. Like a lion he was, as people often commented._

_As the eldest son, Raminas II was to be the one who'd take the throne after his father, becoming the King of Dalmasca. As such, he was now at the beginning stages of proving himself worthy of the great honor. The ball was more than a celebration of his birthday; it acted as a way for him to communicate with the nobility of Ivalice. Though King Raminas I certainly thought his son ready for the task, it was important that the rest of the world was accepting of him as well. Dalmasca was a small kingdom, yes, but it often was a crucial part of political negotiations, mostly due to its geography being right in the middle of many of the bigger kingdoms. It was a lot to handle at only seventeen, but Ashe's oldest brother seemed to be taking it in stride. _

_Looking away from the future King, Ashe turned her attention back to the main entry way, just in time to catch a new group entering. From the other side of the room the Princess couldn't catch details of the guests, but general things stood out. Dark haired, they all were; a big clue that they were certainly not Dalmascan. From what she could gather, the group of eight was most likely a family. Along with the way they were dressed and how everyone seemed to be fussing about them, they were obviously of some kind of importance. Was that a King's headdress she saw on the elder man's head? Leaning over to Halim, she hoped that he would be able to inform her on just who she was looking at._

_"Halim, who are they? The ones who just entered."  
_

_"Haven't the slightest... Abram, who are those people over there?"_

_With an irritated sigh, the thirteen year old looked away from his book and adjusted his silver reading glasses as he looked out onto the ballroom floor. Ashe could see her brother's gray eyes squint as he concentrated, and after a few moments of silence Abram spoke with an assured tone. "Oh, those would be the Solidors. House Solidor is in charge of Archadia. To the West of us, remember?"_

_The look on Halim's face made it clear that he most certainly did not remember, but Ashelia nodded in response. Though she was yet young, and therefore not expected to be fully educated, as a princess she was taught the basic knowledge for a royal. This included the geography of Ivalice, which was quite the crucial skill to have. Apparently, despite Halim being a year older than she, he was not as attentive to his lessons. Not all surprising, considering how the brown haired boy was much more concerned with causing trouble than his royal duties. The nine year old proved this true as he seemed to be satisfied with Abram's answer, quickly returning to his people-watching activities._

_Ashe continued to observe this House Solidor however, noticing that the woman of the group held a mere infant in her arms, the babe's hair as dark as the rest of the family. She remembered then hearing around the palace of an Empress who had recently given birth to a son. Ashe could only assume that this was the one they were speaking of, though she couldn't for the life of her remember the woman's name. Did it begin with an M? Or maybe it was an R... No, an S! As she tried to decide for sure, she was about ready to ask one of her brothers when she noticed something out of the corner of her eye. Out on the dance floor was her brother Jonas, the only one of the eight she hadn't seen so far that day. Other than Raminas who was up and walking around, the other six had been sitting at the table along with her. She had wondered where her fifteen year old brother had been hiding. Then again, the teen was never much of a party person._

_In fact, he was so against the sentiment of parties that she was quite surprised to see her brother not only in attendance, but out on the floor dancing! By the Gods, it must have been some sort of miracle of the fates. Jonas Dalmasca was an incredibly quiet and introverted lad, speaking only when spoken to. In fact, if you were to let him have his way, he would certainly prefer never to speak at all. Her other brothers often teased him for it, pretending to have forgotten what their brother's voice sounded like whenever he__** did**__ decide to talk. Ashe was quite used to this by now and the fact that he was apparently enjoying himself at a gala was a bit unexpected. Who was it that he was dancing with? Ashe leaned forward in her seat, trying to catch a glimpse of the lucky girl._

_She could see that the girl was blonde with a golden tone to her long locks. The mystery girl's ball gown was quite pretty, the pink dress much better than the blue one she currently wore, in her own opinion. There really wasn't much else that she could see from so far away, but Ashelia's curiosity only grew. The Princess felt compelled to spy on her quiet brother, getting up from her seat at the table to get a closer look. She had been hoping to be able to sneak off unnoticed, but of course one of her brothers was bound to notice. In this case it was two of them: her twin brothers Darius and Alecks. They were the second and third oldest of the Dalmascan children, respectively, both nearly to turn sixteen. Hardly ever separate from each other, the two fraternal brothers were very much in tune, despite their differences in both appearance and personality. _

_"Where are you going, Ashelia?"_

_"She is __**going**__ to get lost, if she fails to stay where she belongs."  
_

_"I am sure she will be fine, Darius. Our sister is intelligent enough."_

_"It does not take a lack of intelligence to be swept away by the crowd."_

_"Why must you always assume the very worst, brother?"  
_

_"I assume nothing! I am simply stating fact."_

_As her brothers bickered, Ashe signaled Halim to be quiet as she backed away from the table slowly, not wanting her escape to be ruined. Once she was far enough from them, the young girl shook her head at the thought of the twins. They hardly agreed on anything, and yet in reality they got along so well. She often wondered how they got to be that way, one so pessimistic while the other always remained hopeful. It was surprising that Alecks could keep his positive attitude when Darius would always try to shoot it down whenever he got the chance. Even the way they looked contrasted in this manner, Alecks' youthful face and bright blue eyes the polar opposite to Darius' sharp, gray-eyed features._

_However, as interesting as her twin brothers may have been, they were not the subject of her interest at that moment. No, she had a goal in mind and until her curiosity was quelled she would continue with it. Making her way towards the middle of the ballroom, Ashe kept her eyes on Prince Jonas, his deep black hair standing out well enough amongst the group of mostly blonde guests. She was about five yards away from the dancing couple when something else managed to catch her attention completely. A new group was being announced as they entered, and this time Ashelia caught the name—House Nabradia; which, in itself, didn't ring any bells within her mind. The name meant nothing to her until she actually looked at the people entering, a look of surprise on her face. Was that who she thought it was?_

_Abandoning her previous mission of brother spying, Ashe quickly made the decision that she could always observe Jonas later on in the evening. Changing directions from the dance floor to the main entrance stairs, she made her way through the crowd. This in itself was a bit of a difficult feat, considering how the small child needed to squeeze her way through, avoiding being nearly stepped on. Ashe may have been a royal princess, but in appearances she was just some little blonde girl scampering about. It was a lot easier to get around when she had the palace's personal knights escorting her as they often did. They couldn't do so now, the girl knew, as they had the more important job of keeping the gala's perimeter secure._

_By the time she was relatively close to where she wanted to be, Ashelia was so intent on getting there that she wasn't exactly paying attention to where she was walking. Instead of looking straight ahead like she should have been her gaze was a bit off to the side as she tried to follow the path of the Nabradian family. By then she couldn't even see the particular person she had been looking for, and it wasn't until she bumped straight into someone and was nearly knocked over that her attention was drawn away. Catching her balance, she rubbed at her head as she tried to get rid of the stunned feeling. Looking to see who she had almost run over, she gasped in surprise._

_"Rasler?"_

_The fair-haired lad smiled at her before giving a brief bow, the etiquette training of a prince obviously quite heavily instilled in him. "Princess," he said in a very friendly manner, sounding much less sombre than the first time they had met. "I thought I would run into you here, but...not so literally." The boy shook his head with a sudden look of concern, "I probably should have been paying attention to where I was going. You're not hurt, are you?"_

_Still somewhat shocked at the prince's sudden appearance, Ashe took a moment to collect her bearings before responding. "Oh, oh no, I'm fine. I was just a bit distracted..." _

The Dalmascan princess couldn't quite recall what they had gone on to talk about, probably some trivial subject as children tend to make big deals of. However, she did remember that through their conversations at her brother's birthday celebration they gained an almost immediate friendship. It was a new experience for her, to have someone close to her age outside of family to socialize with. As young royalty, Ashe was generally quite sheltered. Other than the younger few of her eight brothers, she really didn't have many friends in her age group. Perhaps a few cousins here and there would come to visit, but otherwise she was friendlier with the servants and knights than with other children. The young prince of Nabradia was a more than welcome change for her.

Ashe closed her eyes briefly, the memory of the day she became friends with the then young boy a bittersweet one to dwell on. She was thankful for the event, of course, but _now_ it was more painful to think about than anything. Trying to change her train of thought to something less emotionally wearying, Ashe remembered another aspect of that day. Ashelia had become so preoccupied with Rasler that she had completely forgotten about Jonas and his dance partner. It didn't matter much in the long run though, as she would soon enough come to know the girl who had caught her older brother's interest during the party. Frowning, Ashe realized this thought in itself brought back sad memories, her mission to think of more cheerful things a failure._ Poor Jonas_, she thought, the memory of her kind brother pulling at her heartstrings.

Before Ashe could dwell any further on the fourth Dalmascan prince, however, a distinct noise from out in the hallway caught her attention. It was the sound of armor clanking around, a sign that the young woman certainly was not the only one awake. At first she didn't have a definite guess as to who it could be, as armor was very much a requirement for Resistance members, but by the sound itself she could narrow it down a bit. They all had their armor, but only a few of the men in the group were so loud in their movement—the Knights of the Old Order. This left about ten or so men to choose from, but she was made absolutely sure when the noise seemed to stop right in front of the door to her quarters. Likely it was General Vossler Azelas making another appearance; surely, really.

This time he didn't knock or make his presence known, however, perhaps trying to decide for sure if he wanted to disturb the princess. Frowning even more deeply at this, Ashe again made no move to let him in or let the knight know that she was awake. Though she honestly did feel as though she needed to talk to someone, to get things off her chest, now the guilt of having snapped at him earlier was weighing in. She didn't want to face him just yet; feeling more inclined to wait until morning. It was rather late now anyway, she assumed. He probably was more interested in checking on her than making conversation. As she waited to see how long he would stay, Ashe finally sat up in her bed and rested her chin on her palm.

Eventually, as she had predicted, the sound of clinking armor came and went once more, signifying that Vossler had left. The princess was being a bit of a coward in how she refused to go out and catch up with him, she knew. Even so she was unable to convince herself to put aside her inhibitions and just do what was right. _Oh, how proud they would be,_ Ashe thought sarcastically, in reference to her many loved ones lost. If she couldn't do something as simple as apologizing for her mistakes, how could she expect to lead the entire Resistance? This was a question that she didn't want to even think of the answer to.

* * *

**Hope you enjoyed the chapter! You know what I enjoy? Reviews. Reviews are like my drug~ I need more or I will go into withdrawal. (Well, drugs are bad, but...) Just click that gray/green button there! Trust me.**


	4. In Shining Armor

**Well looky here! If it isn't another chapter that actually didn't take a lifetime to upload! Aren't you proud of me, fanfiction readers? I'm sure you are. I think I deserve a prize. (-coughreviewcough-) Anywaaay, thank you for the reviews I already received, they really are very endearing. I'm glad that at least a few people like my odd little ramblings. It brightens my day~ Let's get on to the story though.**

**I own lots of things, but not one of those things is Final Fantasy XII. **

**

* * *

**

**Chapter Four - In Shining Armour**

Quite a bit of time had passed since Vossler's departure, and Ashelia was still in the exact same position as before: in her bed, back straight, as she rested her chin on her palm. Honestly, sitting up the way she was, it was more a method of keeping herself awake even longer than anything. The princess still did not wish to slumber, figuring that she would only be plagued by vicious nightmares brought about by her jumbled thoughts. The memories themselves were messing with her enough—the last thing she needed was to have them made worse by the darker parts of her subconscious. Given the choice, she much preferred to deal with her inner dilemmas while awake; a sense of at least a little bit of control somewhat comforting. Well, a _little_ being the key phrase, as Ashe certainly couldn't stop herself from experiencing these flashbacks so randomly brought on.

Every time the young woman tried to think of _nothing_, some kind of reminder would just come out of the woodworks and trigger another episode. If she were to self-diagnose, Ashe would probably assume that she was experiencing some kind of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. She had certainly experienced enough traumas in her seventeen years of life. In fact, she sometimes wondered if the fates had confused her with some hardened soldier; someone who would have been strong enough to handle all the pain and loss. Were they trying to break her? If so, was it beginning to work? The blonde only wished that she could answer that question with a definite no. The only thing she had in common with the hardened soldier was the fact she was now forced to wield a sword. Luckily for her, even before the war had changed (read: ruined) her life, she had been inspired to take up this un-princess-like sport. She could even remember the day she decided such, so many years ago...

_At ten years old, Princess Ashelia B'Nargin Dalmasca was hardly ever in one stationary place within the palace. Though her father certainly would have liked for his daughter to be more... reserved in her actions, Ashe simply was not interested in sitting around and doing dull, ladylike things. By then she knew her etiquette, and despite her adventurous streak she was quite good at acting the part of a royal princess when it was needed. However, on a more casual day—going about the palace as she often did—the young girl acted more like the average child her age than that of nobility. This was obvious in how she went from hall to hall; spying on the palace's many inhabitants. She rather enjoyed observing the goings on of the palace, whether it was one of her brothers, the cooks in the kitchen, the guards, or her father signing important documents. _

_Today she was outside of the palace for once, roaming around the gardens and fields that surrounded Dalmasca's royal residence. It was a beautiful day in the Royal City of Rabanastre, the sun shining in the bright blue sky. Actually this wasn't much of a change from what was the norm, as the climate in her home country was a warm one, with the sun hardly ever obscured by rain clouds. This had always been the case, and yet the Princess was mostly kept inside. Apparently, it was for her own safety and security, but Ashelia didn't much buy this excuse. They probably just did not want her running around outside, soiling her petticoat or some other such nonsense. The girl huffed at this thought, walking along the path that led through the garden and into the field._

_Looking around at all the sights there were to see, Ashe observed the many beautiful flowers and exotic plants that decorated the royal garden. Most of it had been the design of Queen Farrah, who had been the mother of her three eldest brothers. She had passed on long before Ashe had been born, she knew, but from the many stories she heard, Farrah had been just as beloved as Azra. Oftentimes when walking around the garden, she would catch her brother Raminas going about the garden, an expression of deep contemplation on his strong features. Perhaps the lovely flora reminded him of the mother he had lost._

_Looking away from the garden itself, the Princess put her attention on the cacophony coming from all around her. The Princess could hear the sounds of voices, laughter, footsteps, and all other sorts of noises from the many people who were around the palace. Despite it being a place where many serious and sombre decisions were made, it was also a home to many more amusing, fun activities. For the most part it was an open palace, meaning that citizens were often allowed to explore the courtyard and check out the main interior of the ornate building. Though she was not permitted to associate with strangers (again, 'for her own safety'), Ashe still liked to watch the average citizens, wondering what their lives were like. The girl could bet that __**they**__ didn't have to stay locked up in their home all day, every day. As soon as she was old enough, she decided then, she would like to travel all of Ivalice. _

_Caught up in her thoughts of exploring all her world had to offer one day, Ashelia had long stopped paying attention to where she was going. Instead she simply let her feet take her somewhere, and soon enough she was standing at the edge of the main fields, where many a royal chocobo galloped and played. The grassy area was also used for events such as Chocobo Polo (in which she was not allowed to participate despite her interest, due to her age) and Jousting. Also, every now and then the Dalmascan Army would borrow it for use of training, especially if they wished to show the King their progress. This seemed to be the case that day, as Ashe immediately recognized the armoured birds out on the field to be military mounts. _

_Staying near the very edge of the field, the girl leaned against a nearby tree, hoping not to draw attention to herself. The moment she was noticed, everyone would surely start making some kind of fuss about her. For now, she was much more interested in watching in peace, intrigued by the soldiers during their practice. They seemed to be honing their riding skills, as well as having target practice with bows and arrows. Ashe's gray eyes followed intently as the soldiers maneuvered their chocobos with grace, the large golden birds making sharp turns about the field. She had always wanted to ride in such a way, not having to settle with the more princess-like slow trot she was forced to conform to by those around her. The girl's father was always worried about her well being and safety; not wanting her to do potentially harmful things. Sighing, Ashe wondered if she would __**ever **__be allowed to have any genuine fun; things that didn't matter if she was a princess or not._

_Enthralled by the scene playing out before her, Ashelia couldn't help but admire the skill and stamina required to conquer such feats. Her attention caught by a particular soldier, the girl watched as the man with short, dishevelled brunet hair rounded about a target, hitting it straight on with what seemed like no effort at all. A few of the other soldiers gave a cheer at this, though it was likely they weren't as impressed as the young Princess, seeing as it was surely a normal occurrence. The man wiped at his forehead with his arm, a slight smile on his face. Looking at him, he seemed somewhat familiar, but Ashe couldn't put her finger on it. She had seen many soldiers walking about the palace, so perhaps he had passed by in the halls one day. Her attention was soon taken away from the goateed man however, as one of his other comrades took the limelight._

_In a flash of yellow, a chocobo and its equally golden-haired rider dashed by the small group who had gathered around the first man. The attention of the other soldiers seemed to have been caught by this as well, as they all watched the man pull a few quick turns. He rode with some confidence, Ashe could tell, the chocobo seeming to follow his every command. Once the man had rounded about the target (as was considerably farther away from it than the first had been) he let his arrow fly, making a perfect bulls eye. The girl was quite impressed by this, so much so that she didn't even notice someone approaching her behind. She couldn't help but jump slightly when a voice sounded, though it was one she recognized quite well._

_"Observing our fine soldiers, Ashelia?"_

_Turning around on her heels, Ashe smiled sheepishly at her father, hoping that he wouldn't chastise her for being out. King Raminas only returned the smile however, taking a step forward to stand next to his young daughter. The royal guards who always followed him were indeed close by, but they gave the father and daughter a few feet of space, for some form of privacy. The girl had always wondered if they ever got bored, just following the King around wherever he went. "Oh, good morning Father." Ashe said, standing with her hands folded behind her back, trying to look innocent. "I was only watching for a little while. They are here to show you their training, yes?"_

_"Today the Dalmascan military wished to have me observe the men with the most potential. I will be choosing new Knights for the Order, soon. Have you yet noticed any outstanding characters, daughter?" The King was clearly humouring the child, as it was quite obvious that he would not rely on a ten-year-old girl to make crucial decisions. However, he was kind hearted in nature and had a special spot in his heart for his only daughter. Though he could be strict at times, it was no doubt that the Dalmascan King loved all his children dearly. _

_Just as Ashe was about to try and answer Raminas' question, the attention of both of the royals was drawn away from each other and onto the field. The dark haired man Ashe had observed before was at it again, this time literally riding circles around the others soldiers. Pulling some rather tricky looking maneuvers on the chocobo, the soldier was clearly aiming to impress. The King chuckled at this display, speaking in a light hearted tone. "Dalmasca certainly has many a skilled soldier to choose from."_

_Still pondering over what her father had asked her, the Princess took a few moments to think before making her decision. It was clear that her father really wasn't depending on her answer, but Ashe appreciated any chance to show her father that she was at least somewhat knowledgeable. Pointing out on the field towards the previously mentioned brunet, she spoke decisively. "He is the best rider." The girl then pointed to the golden-haired soldier; "though that one, he has the better shot." _

_The King laughed again at this, lightly patting his daughter on the head. "Is that so?" Raminas asked, greatly endeared by the young Princess. "I do believe you have pointed out Generals Azelas and Fon Ronsenburg. They are young and yet new to their positions, though no less worthy I am told." Just then one of the existing Knights came over to the King, bowing before him respectfully. The man smiled kindly at Ashe, but she only looked at him in curiosity. Usually the people who came to speak with her father just ignored her presence completely, so she had learned to generally do the same._

_"Your Highness, I assume you have been watching them go about their training. Have you your judgements on them? I have hopes that these men will make fine additions to the Order." _

_"Ah, yes. I am glad to see the skill of those who fight for Dalmasca."  
_

_As the two men conversed, Ashe simply let herself stop paying attention to them, turning her gaze back to the field. The ten year old wondered if her older brothers would be able to do such things one day, the majority of them then having started their military training. Perhaps if she asked nicely they would teach her some of the skills that the average princess was kept far away from. It would certainly be more interesting for her than etiquette lessons._

Ashe frowned deeply at this memory, not having intended to bring up a certain someone. _He_ was not in any way worthy of invading her thoughts in such a manner. In fact, he deserved nothing but to be completely forgotten, only to be written off in the history books as a traitor. To think, she had held so much admiration, such respect...it was all gone now; dead and buried along with her father. Bitter thoughts, she knew, but no less true to her feelings. Though in truth words alone could not even wholly express what Ashelia Dalmasca felt in regards to a certain Basch Fon Ronsenburg.

What did it matter anyway? He was gone. Executed. The punishment fit of a King-Slayer had been dealt to him, if her Uncle Halim was to be believed. There was no use in dwelling on him any longer. He had betrayed her more than she had ever been before. She would not give his spirit the satisfaction of haunting her, she refused to do so. Ashe had no need to preoccupy herself with hate when she had many, _many_ other things more worthy of her concentration. Glaring out at the darkness, Ashelia attempted to calm herself. It was not the time now to give in to the hatred of a dead man. She was still living, and she still had something to fight for._ Someone_ to fight for...

* * *

**And so ends Chapter Four! A bit shorter, but I hope you don't mind too much. I don't have much else to say other than what I always do at the bottom here. Reviews are nice, you should write me one, etc. Though I've noticed the button has changed color on me. Odd.**


	5. Lovesick

**No reviews at all? This saddens me. Eh, I'll get over it though. Maybe. Perhaps. Possibly.**

**Well, don't worry. The last chapter wasn't exactly action packed but I think this one offers more story-wise. I can only hope I'll win back some of your positive sentiments. This is kind of a starting point to a wave of misfortune on Ashe's part, sorry to say. Tis just the way the story goes~**

**I own nothing except the the story itself. I defintely do not own Final Fantasy XII.**

* * *

**Chapter Five - Lovesick**

Ashe wondered if it was the dark, cramped space of the bedroom that was doing this to her. What else provided a reasonable explanation for the mental anguish she was currently experiencing? It was not farfetched to believe that the prison cell of a room could have some kind of truly negative effect on its inhabitant. At that point in time, Ashelia accepted the possibility merely out of desperation to escape the depressing mindset she was stuck in. If leaving her quarters for a while would help in some way, the princess was certainly willing to try. Of course, she would have to be extremely careful not to alert anyone else in the compound.

Standing from her seat on the bed (though really it was nothing more than a cot with surprisingly comfortable blankets), Ashe slipped out of the metal armor coverings on her feet. The girl had removed most of her armor long ago upon entering to her bedroom. However, she hadn't bothered with the shoes, the habit of not taking them off until she was just about to fall asleep holding true. Now on the soft soles of her pink boots, she knew that it'd be easier to be a bit stealthier. Honestly, as she stood there stretching to take away the pain of having been in one position for so long, Ashe felt bare and vulnerable without her armor. It was odd to imagine that less than a month before the Princess would never have imagined the day where she would be asked to dress in metal more extensive than golden thread.

Finally ready to leave the room, Ashe adjusted the hem of her skirt before walking over to the door, pulling it open as slowly as she could manage. She flinched as the wood creaked ever so slightly, and the princess froze, waiting to see if anyone had stirred. No sound came after a few moments, and she then proceeded to tiptoe out into the hallway. Ashe knew that she needed to be careful, as any sort of distinct sound surely would break someone out of their slumber.

It was difficult to sneak around when one lived with about twenty men, all of whom were either knights or high ranking soldiers; men who certainly paid great attention to their surroundings. Though, all things considered, it was indeed a small number, considering their organization. The Resistance was a very large group, in terms of how many seemed to support them, but the actual active members were in the lower numbers. Most of them lived there at the headquarters, though there were a few other more prominent men and women who lived normal lives outside of the underground.

Ashelia envied these members at times, wishing she could live a double life successfully as they did. In a way she did, disguising herself when the need came to leave the base, but it simply wasn't the same. Even though she could always spend a few hours enjoying the Rabanastran Marketplace, she would always have to return to the Lowtown at the end of the day; back to the dark, depressing, underprivileged area where the Resistance had 'set up shop', so to speak. It was a smart move, yes, choosing a place that was mostly ignored, but no less unsettling. Ashe became more used to it as time went on, but a large part of her wished to help the others who were forced to live in such conditions. Of course, she could do nothing whatsoever until she regained her throne—and only the Gods knew when _that_ would happen.

Creeping along in the dark, Ashe had to be wary of the shadowed objects like tables and chairs that she could bump into. The last thing she wanted was to trip and cause a rather loud thud, indicating that she was out and about. That, and if they were to run out in alarm, it would be quite embarrassing to explain why she was lying on the ground in a heap. Just as this thought came to mind, the princess panicked and just had to, rather ungracefully, catch her balance after tripping on the leg of a small side table. Of course. She let out an aggravated sigh, silently cursing the forsaken table for being put in the worst possible place in the hall.

Now being more careful than she had been before, Ashe headed in the direction of their living room; or at least, what could be considered the equivalent of one. In no time at all she was there, the room almost lit up by the moonlight that shined though the many small, high windows. Though they were indeed underground, the Resistance headquarters just so happened to be located right by one Lowtown's skylight areas. This was something Ashe was very thankful for, knowing that even if the tiny windows reminded her even more of a cell, at least she could see the sky through them.

Taking a seat on a padded bench near the aforementioned windows, the princess gazed out at said starry sky. It was relaxing in a way, to watch the glimmering lights shine amongst the dark blanket of night. Of course, it was only a matter of time until her serenity was broken. As she had partly predicted, the sky itself acted as another trigger for her subconscious. The thought of her older brother Jonas returned, the memory of his love of stargazing coming to mind. Personally, she would have liked to leave the memory at that. However, her mind was inclined to automatically delve deeper, the story of her dear brother not one she could easily ignore.

_Walking quickly through the lengthy halls, Princess Ashe knew exactly where she wanted to go. Today was a lazy day at the palace, and as such there wasn't much for the thirteen-year-old to do. It was dreary and raining in Rabanastre, a rarity in itself but something that did happen occasionally. Knowing that she couldn't go outside because of this, Ashe needed some way to entertain herself without much effort. Taking the first option that came to mind, the girl decided that she would enjoy some peaceful alone time in the palace's sun room—even if there was no sun to be seen._

_Once she was there, the young girl was quite surprised to see that the doors were closed, and being protected by guards. She thought this odd, but approached the room anyway, which in turn caused the guards to bow respectfully at the girl. Smiling at the two guards in front of the large double doors, Ashe wondered if they ever thought it strange bowing to a child. The princess let the armored men open the doors for her (as they were so heavy she could barely do so herself), and she slowly stepped inside. Immediately she noticed that the room was not empty, something she had assumed upon seeing the guards. Quite the contrary, there were two very familiar people sitting next to each other on a sofa, facing the wall of windows. _

_"Sister," greeted Prince Jonas with a kind smile, having turned to observe who had entered the room. Ashe could tell from the look on his face that he was happy about something, but she couldn't discern what that was. Her brother had always been a rather difficult one to read. Still, she smiled back and began to walk in their direction, hoping that they wouldn't ask her to leave. "Hello, Jonas. Good morning, Cora." At this the girl called Cora, who had turned to look at her as well when Jonas had spoken, returned the greeting with genuine enthusiasm. _

_"Why good morning to you as well, Ashe! I fear I have not seen you about all week. Pray tell, just where have you been hiding?"_

_"Oh, I've been here and there..."_

_"Well, you should certainly join us. Your brother and I were just discussing how well Prince Raminas did at his speech for the War Council." She looked to the fourth prince for agreement, and she got it in the form of a silent nod from the dark-haired lad. Placing a delicate hand against the young man's arm, Cora had an amused look on her fair features as she spoke to the younger girl, lowering her voice to a faux whisper. "Jonas is very proud of him, though he'd never admit."_

_At this the prince shot a pointed look at his female companion, causing her to laugh and put a hand to his cheek affectionately. "Oh, don't look at me so! You know I mean no harm," Cora said, managing to get a brief flicker of a smile from the normally aloof male. It was gone as quickly as it came, however, Jonas going back to his usual handsome but blank expression. Ashe shook her head at the two, going over to sit on a lounge chair next to the sofa. She stared out through the windows, watching the rain pelt the stone patio. By then the princess had stopped paying full attention, but the soft murmur of Cora and Jonas continuing their conversation still reached her ears._

_Turning to look back at them after a while, Ashe began to really think about the two young adults sitting a few feet away from her. It was hard to believe that they had met each other only five years earlier, when it seems as though they had always been together. She could still recall the day of Raminas II's seventeenth birthday, when she had seen the two waltzing across the dance floor. She later found out that Jonas had met the blonde girl at the gala, the two immediately hitting it off. It had been surprising at first, knowing the prince's personality, but by now Ashe knew that Cora brought out the best in him. The girl, who had been born in the former Republic of Landis, was quite lovely in her cheerful and friendly nature. _

_In almost no time it was rather obvious that the two had fallen for each other. Ashe especially saw this in her brother, who seemed to have gone through some sort of transformation after meeting her. The near mute boy remained quiet in nature, but he actually managed to speak and let his opinions be known more. Also, he was a lot more willing to be sociable and have genuine fun. This change in him only grew stronger whenever Cora was around—the fact that she was at the palace so frequently acting as a clue, in itself. By then, Ashe almost considered Cora another one of her siblings, despite the lack of marriage between her and Jonas. Cora and Rasler basically tied for the number of times they visited the royal Dalmascan family. Of course, it was a bit odder in the case of the blonde girl._

_Cora was a girl of common blood in truth, having only been at the gala at all as the guest of a nobleman friend. Of course, that clearly made no difference at all for Jonas Dalmasca. This very fact was something that Ashelia had always admired in her brother. Even though he had plenty of opportunity to associate himself with more high society figures, he chose not to. Jonas was even widely considered the most handsome of the Dalmascan Princes, his deep green eyes and raven hair the subject of many a girlish crush throughout Ivalice. Though he was not the eldest son, the twenty-year-old prince was predicted to have first picks on who he would court. Jonas could have found himself with any of the beautiful and glamorous women of nobility from throughout Ivalice._

_And yet, the girl who he had let steal his heart was far from extravagant; pretty but rather plain. Ashe didn't have that opinion herself, but others might have pointed out that the only real distinguishable quality of Cora's would have been her long waves of golden hair. She wore not diamonds and gold, but cotton and leather. The girl came not wearing a detailed dress, but instead her average pants and cropped top, the latest fashion of the civilians in Ivalice. All these things could have put off your average prince, but it meant nothing to Jonas. All he saw was Cora, the girl with a pretty smile, a lovely voice, and a kind soul._

_"Do either of you feel terribly warm?" Cora asked quite suddenly, breaking the girl's train of thought. At this the Dalmascan Prince shook his head briefly in response, and Ashe said that she felt fine. Frowning, it was clear that this was not the answer the blonde had been hoping for. Wringing her hands together in a somewhat nervous manner, she went on to speak once more. "Oh. Well, I've been feeling this awful heat all day..."_

_Jonas' dark brows furrowed, a look of mild concern appearing on his tanned features. "Are you ill?" He asked her, sounding more concerned than he looked. For someone so unusually quiet, his voice was not at all timid or self conscious. No, the Prince had a strong tone to voice, perhaps only rivaled by the almost rumbling quality of that of Prince Raminas. Cora often complimented Jonas on this, but at that point in time his voice was the last thing she was worrying herself about. Shrugging her shoulders, the twenty-year-old girl's words sounded unsure despite her actions. "I have not a thing to worry about, most likely. Perhaps it is all in my head; you know what tricks one's mind can play."_

_Not seeming to accept this answer, Jonas reached over and placed a palm against her forehead, recoiling after a moment as though he had been burned. Now there was an obvious frown on his face, despite her insistence that she was fine. "You have a fever. Let me take you to the healer." With this Jonas got up from his seat, extending a hand to help the blonde up. Cora didn't move however, shaking her head and trying to reassure him. "I feel fine. There's no need to make a fuss over me, Jonas. I assure you, it is probably nothing."_

_However much she protested, her words were in vain, as Jonas simply took her hand firmly and pulled her up to stand. He then attempted to gently guide her towards the door, but Cora stood her ground and dug her heels into the floor. "This is completely unnecessary. We can just stay here. It would be rude of us to leave your poor sister here alone, would it not?" _

_"We will return later."_

_"I am not ill. I need no healer."_

_"We must make sure."  
_

_"But—Oh!"_

_Cora cut herself off as she was suddenly swept off her feet, Jonas effortlessly carrying her across the room in the direction of the doorway. Not even bothering to struggle at that point, the blonde only sighed in amusement, waving over his shoulder at the young girl who had been watching their little show the whole time. "I suppose I'll be leaving then. Until we meet again, Ashe dear!" She laughed as she was carried away bridal style, and Ashe waved back with an entertained expression. It was so funny to see how differently Jonas acted around Cora; quite obviously soul mates, those two._

Shaking her head, Ashe couldn't help but spoil that positive memory with thoughts of what she knew happened afterwards. The princess couldn't ignore that it had been the day that poor Cora began her downward spiral, sickness overwhelming the bright young woman. It was so sudden and unexpected, for her to be perfectly healthy one day and slowly dying the next. Of course, such is what one can expect when dealing with the Plague. Though the healers had realized it early on, there seemed to be nothing they could do. Even though Jonas had insisted she stay at the palace rather than returning to her home, in order to receive the best care, it wasn't enough. They all had to watch her lay in bed dying, the dark-haired Prince never leaving her side.

It had been more than depressing a time, as if the entire palace lost energy along with the Landis-born girl. Ashe could remember crying at her bed side, then realizing how much of a constant Cora's presence had been. It was only worsened for them all as her condition deteriorated, and Ashe recalled even her busy father making time to visit the young woman several times. King Raminas had known that his son held great affection for her, but he himself had grown to like her quite well. It seemed like everyone was affected by the sickened blonde, though no one could compare to Jonas.

Ashe had watched sadly as her brother quickly reverted to the mute nature he had before meeting Cora, to an even greater extreme. Prince Jonas either spoke in one word responses or not at all, his strong voice sounding tired and strained even in so little words. It was like he was losing part of himself, and everyone could see it. Even their other brothers, who had found fun in teasing him frequently, were incredibly solemn during that period. All of these changes were strange, but they came to a peak when worst finally came to worst.

When Cora died, it hit everyone hard. They knew that it would happen; there was no denying that it was expected. Once someone had the Plague, it was only a matter of time before they could go on no longer. As the days went by and Cora lost more and more of her spirit, they all knew what was to come. They were all aware that it was inevitable, and yet when it finally occurred it was as though none of them had expected it at all. In fact, it was such a shock for them that no one even noticed that Jonas, who ignored it in his grief, had started to develop symptoms himself. By the time he sought treatment it was much too late. There was nothing they could do...

Realizing that she was crying now, Ashe buried her face in her hands. Sighing heavily, she wiped away the tears and kept her head bowed. It was difficult to think about those two, and how they were both gone so quickly. They were meant to be together, clearly, even if it was in death. A bittersweet sentiment, which only succeeded in making her feel worse. If only they could have been saved, they would have had a grand future to look forward to. A tragic ending they had, one that was hard-hitting to even strangers who had never met either of them. Ashe could still remember the citizens whispering about their sad tale at the joint public funeral.

Jonas had been the first of her brothers to leave her, starting off a sequence that would only hammer away at her spirit, breaking it bit by bit. In a way this made it worse to think about him, as though she should have known that his death would be an omen for bad things to come. Perhaps if they had been able to cure him it would have ended the cycle of loss. The princess pondered this possibility at times, though she knew it was of no help. It was much too late now. What's done is done. It had been long ago proven that Ashelia could not deny the Fates their will to destroy her. No matter how hard she tried.

* * *

**I have to say, now that I really think about this chapter, it depresses me. Even though I wrote it. I feel horrible for making this happen. Forgive me~ It had to be done. I hope you enjoyed it though, even if it's not exactly the feel-good story of the year. If you did, you should let me know in a review! Until next time...**


	6. Roses Are Red

**You know, kind reader, I've always told myself that if I ever wrote a fanfic, I wouldn't be one of those people who never updates. Yet here we are. I apologize. Guess that's life for a senior in high school trying to get into college? Or a lazy person. Probably both. I feel guilty, honest. For my other story I seem to have ditched too. Shame on me!**

**I kinda gave up on actually writing this story but I had this and another chapter done so I'm posting them. Hopefully someone remembers this story and can enjoy. Or a new person, that works too. If you do, you should let me know through that nice review feature! Maybe I'll continue writing? Only time can tell. But without further ado, here is chapter six.**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter Six - Roses are Red**

As Ashe sat in subdued silence, she shifted her gaze from the window onto the ground. The Princess couldn't bear to look at the moon anymore, knowing that the sight would only depress her further. She didn't want to keep thinking about death, and yet by then the memory of her brother Jonas was only setting into motion thoughts of the others she had lost. Her mother Azra had indeed died when she was very young, but it wasn't until Jonas and Cora that it seemed like everything was going downhill. One loss after another, Ashelia found all the different pieces of her life falling apart. The only thing she could actually keep as a permanent aspect of her adolescence was Rasler, who had helped her through it all.

Wanting to lighten up her spirits, Ashe tried to concentrate on happier times in her childhood. Rasler had been with her through so much, she had plenty of positive memories of her experiences with him. In fact, the memory of her brother brought on a recollection of one such happier time, just nearly a year after Jonas' death. Knowing the anniversary was about to occur, Ashe had been incredibly depressed, and it had been her best friend who came to the rescue.

_It was quite a beautiful day in the royal city of Rabanastre. The middle of the Spring season, the whole city seemed even more lively than usual. Blue skies and green grass were all around, making for a gorgeous scene about the home of Ashe Dalmasca. She could see that it was too lovely a day to sit inside, and the girl had made her way outdoors to enjoy the weather. It didn't take her long to get to her specific destination, as she simply headed straight to where she knew it would look most beautiful that sunny day. _

_Sitting in the royal palace's rose garden, Princess Ashe stared down blankly at the green grass, lost in her thoughts. It was exactly one week until the first anniversary of her older brother's death. For the last few days before that, it had been all Ashe could think about. It'd been a while since the late Prince had weighed so heavily on her mind. As the year had gone by, the girl had managed to move on for the most part. However, every now and then she would still feel the pain of her loss; something having reminded her of Jonas or Cora. Now it was the very date causing the problem, and there was not much the fourteen-year-old could do to ignore it._

_Sighing, the girl touched at the roses on the bush she was sitting by, liking how soft and silky the petals felt. It was at least somewhat comforting to surround herself with such beauty. The garden was certainly a peaceful place, the rainbow of flowers a sight to behold. It seemed as though they had every pretty plant in all of Ivalice there, from the indigenous to the rare and exotic. The roses she sat next to now were from Bhujerba, she knew, the rich violet color very recognizable. These had been her mother's favorite kind, and a plaque for Queen Azra sat in the grass a few feet away from her. It was for this reason that Ashe often chose that specific spot to sit when in the garden, as most of the palace regulars knew by then._

_Sometimes her father would visit her when she was there, spending quiet time looking at the flowers with his daughter. Other times one of her brothers would make an appearance, or maybe even a Knight or two. She never really knew who would show up when, which in some ways made her special spot even more interesting. Usually she wasn't caught completely by surprise though, the cobblestone path leading there making it easy to hear the footsteps of someone approaching. Too caught up in her thoughts of mourning this time, though, Ashe gasped in surprise as someone suddenly appeared and sat down next to her._

_"Did I frighten you?"_

_The Princess shook her head with a smile, feeling slight embarrassment at having been caught so off guard. "No, of course not, Rasler." Ashe turned sideways to face him, her dreary mood suddenly a bit brighter upon the blond boy's surprise appearance. She hadn't seen him in a week or so, which was quite a while by their standards. Teleport crystals made it easy for them to see each other very frequently, a fact both teens greatly appreciated. Whether their fathers shared the same opinion on how much time they spent together was a different question, but one that they ignored when they could. _

_"I will take your word, Ashe." The prince offered, smiling back at her in that soft but friendly manner of his. Though she would not admit such out loud, seeing the Nabradian boy smile was something the Princess greatly enjoyed. She couldn't help but often notice how his sky blue eyes seemed to just light up when he was genuinely happy. Other than when they were alone, it honestly wasn't something that happened too frequently. Rasler was someone who had always been mature for his age, and for him this came with a way of being somewhat subdued in nature. Though not robotic by any means, it was a special circumstance to have him be clearly expressive. It didn't bother Ashelia at all, of course, only making the times he did let his emotions show freely all the more precious._

_"Where have you been, Rasler? I could have sworn someone had gone and cast a Vanish spell on you."_

_"My father has had me busy. He is making attempts to 'prepare me for my future,' or so he says."_

_"You mean your future as the Great King of Nabradia?"_

_The teenaged Prince sighed wearily, eyes downcast and blond brows furrowing in discontent. Ashe had meant for her words to be a friendly jest, but it was quite obvious that it was a much more serious matter to Rasler. It was especially clear in the way that he sounded so exasperated as he spoke, "My future," He shook his head briefly, "whatever future I may or may not have as the King of Nabradia is yet distant in time. My father acts as though I am to take the throne from him tomorrow. I do not understand why he is so adamant on my premature preparation."_

_Ashe frowned slightly at his words, saddened that her good friend felt this way about his current situation. Of course, even as royalty herself, the Princess could not fully empathize with him. As the youngest of her siblings (and a daughter, no less) she did not have to experience the burdens of such responsibilities. The most she was expected was to learn the very basics, crafts and hobbies taking up more of her time than political studies and military training. Still, she wished to comfort him as best as she possibly could. Reaching out to gently place a hand on his shoulder, Ashe said what she thought would be most helpful then, "He only wishes to make sure that you are ready, Rasler. My own father is that very same way with Raminas. Perhaps it is just the manner of such things. He only means the best by his actions, I'm sure."_

_Placing his hand over hers, a small smile seemed to touch at his lips. "I suppose you're right," He agreed in a somewhat reluctant sounding manner, "I should give my father more leeway. He means well, I know... Though in all honesty, I didn't come visit you to discuss my own problems. Those are matters for some other time. I would much rather hear about how __**you**__ have been, Ashe." These were words which caused quite a bit of curiosity in the Princess. She wondered just why he would be so set on changing the subject onto her._

_"Me? I'm fine..."_

_"Are you?"_

_"I am, yes."_

_"You certainly didn't look it, when I first saw you sitting here."_

_Ashe's gray-eyed gaze was cast down then, not bothering to make any sort of retort. The girl thought it easier to stare at her lap than at Rasler, whose own eyes were silently examining her. Sometimes it was almost irritating how __**aware**__ a person the Nabradian Prince was. Over her years of knowing Rasler so personally, Ashe was extremely conscious of just how difficult it was to get something past him. Of course, that didn't mean that blonde was not willing to try to succeed in doing so. In fact, right then she debated simply repeating that she was perfectly fine, only to change her mind after a moment. No matter what she was to tell him, he would eventually figure out exactly what was wrong. He always did._

_"I've been thinking about Jonas," Ashelia admitted quietly, finding it somehow difficult to hear herself say his name out loud. She was quite used to referring to her late brother as 'he' or 'him', the actual name having become almost forbidden. This difficulty she had was something Rasler clearly noticed, as his grip on her hand—which he still had not let go of by that point—tightened ever-so-slightly. Ashe still didn't look in his direction as she attempted to compose herself. Just saying her brother's name was enough to activate the more vulnerable and emotional parts of her subconscious. This was not at all the reaction she would have hoped to have. Ashe certainly did not want to go and start crying in front of him. The last time that had happened was during the funeral, where he had sat next to her in solemn support. _

_"It's alright to miss him, you know," Rasler gently said, causing Ashe to eventually look up at him. _

_"What do you mean?"_

_"You're punishing yourself for being sad. I can see that you are."_

_How could he have possibly come to that conclusion? She hadn't even realized the truth in that herself until he had said it. It really did seem to be an explanation as to why she refused to let herself feel what was truly there... Wondering as she often did if he had been gifted with some advanced form of Libra, Ashe reverted back to staring downwards. Did she really want to admit her fears and anxieties to him? Yes, she trusted Rasler, perhaps more than anyone else. Yes, she was almost positive he would be ready and willing to listen. However, that didn't make her feel any less like it was a bad idea. So, Ashe simply said nothing, which Rasler took as an excuse to speak again._

_"No one thinks you weak for having emotion. I certainly don't, Ashe..."_

_Yes, it was definitely some superior Libra. There was no other explanation for how well he could see through her, no matter what walls she tried to put up. He was right, of course. In the back of her mind she did have the tendency to assume that people would think her weak or less worthy for her more human qualities. Could one truly blame her for feeling this way, considering her environment? Her brothers were all brought up to be strong soldiers, men who had no fear, no feelings that would hinder their fight. Her father, the King, he had to be forever a pillar of great strength, someone all of Dalmasca's people could depend on no matter what. With such people surrounding her, it was easy for her to decide that she would refuse to show any sort of weakness. _

_"Do you truly mean that, Rasler?"_

_"I give you my word."_

_"Your word...?"_

_"Is that not enough?" With this Rasler brought Ashe's hand down from his shoulder, gently taking her other so he had a hold of both. The Princess looked him in the eye then, finding herself surprised at how blue they were, despite the many times she had seen them. It became almost difficult for her to pay attention to anything else, though she managed to listen when he spoke again. "I promise you, Ashelia. You will never be weak to me. No matter what you do, no matter what ever happens. Nothing will change how I think of you."_

_Ashe opened her mouth to reply, but she found that she truly had no idea what to say. 'Speechless' was not a word that could often be described to the Princess, but at that moment it fit perfectly. The girl just couldn't believe that he would say something so meaningful to her, being so clearly genuine. Thanking him for it was the first thing that came to mind, but she wasn't sure of the proper way to do so. As she pondered in silence, staring at him thoughtfully, Rasler seemed to have come to a realization. He gently released her hands, a slight frown on his face._

_"I told my father I would only be gone briefly," Rasler sighed with regret, "I should go. I will have more free time tomorrow; we can enjoy the day. Hopefully the weather will be as pleasant as it is now... Does that sound alright?" _

_Ashe only nodded silently in response. _

_"I will see you later then. Goodbye, Ashe."_

_Getting up to leave, Rasler bowed at the girl as was his tradition, before reluctantly turning and walking back towards the path. He was only a few steps away when Ashe stood up herself, quickly going over to him and grabbing his wrist. The Prince turned back around to face her then, only to be enveloped in a tight hug. Only about half a second of surprise passed before he returned the embrace, which comforted the blonde girl. If she had been given the choice she would have liked them to stay that way forever, but of course the hug had to end. Just before Rasler went to pull away, the Princess leaned in close enough to plant a quick kiss on his cheek. This was clearly something the Nabradian boy wasn't expecting, and Ashe smiled in amusement at his expression. She could have sworn that he was even beginning to blush... _

_"I'll take your word for it, Rasler." _

A sad half-smile crossed Ashelia's features at this memory, one that still meant so much to her after all these years. Of course, it was hard to forget the moment where she first began to fall in love. At the time, the Princess had been so young and oblivious that she hadn't even realized this fact. Funny how you could miss so much while in the moment... With a deep breath Ashe slowly removed the bright blue ring from her right hand, thoughtfully staring down at it sitting in her palm. Even in the dim moonlight, the blue crystal that made up the inner band still seemed to glow beautifully. Ashe felt herself become mesmerized by it, her stare unbroken for quite some time. This wasn't a surprising reaction, seeing as the ring was something she put so much value on. Despite the fact that the two rings she wore were identical in appearance, the one she was looking at actually did mean more to her than the ring that adorned her actual ring finger. Her own wedding band was precious to her of course, but the fact that she had Rasler's made it beyond compare.

Closing her hand around the cool metal and crystal of the ring, Ashe wondered whether Rasler would have approved of all that she had done since. Would he still see her as strong? Yes, he had advised her against hiding away emotion, but surely so _much_ emotion at once was not what he had meant. Part of her imagined that he watching her at that very moment, asking himself just when the Princess had let her own weaknesses overtake her. Would he be proud of her work in the Resistance? Would he be glad to see that she was working towards peace? Or would he be ashamed at the fear and hopelessness she was beginning to feel?

"Rasler..." Ashe heard herself suddenly whisper with a slight air of longing, his name seeming to come so naturally. It had almost always been that way for her, but now there was one main difference to the way it had been before. No matter how many times she called out to him, he would never answer back. It didn't matter how much she wished to hear his voice, or to feel his presence near her. It was never going to be the same as it was only months ago. Ashe had nothing of him to touch or feel left, all except for the ring she gripped in her hand. She needed his warmth, and yet all she had for comfort was a ring of cold, impersonal silver.

And yet, Ashelia was quite thankful for it in the end. It wasn't as though the Princess had any other sort of alternative to go to. Ashe was left with nothing else, and if she would need to guard that ring with all her life she was willing to do so. Wasn't it worth it to protect the one thing she still had of Rasler to treasure? After all, it was better to feel the frigid metal against her skin, than to feel nothing at all.

* * *

**Well well, wasn't that depressing? Again, my apologizes. I only hope you can forgive me enough to read the next chapter once I finally post it. Or review! Reviewing would be nice. I'm unsure about the future fate of this story, but I figured I might as well post what I already have. Let's just hope some inspiration comes my way sometime soon. Inspiration that may come through someone pressing a certain button below, if ya know what I mean. (hinthintnudgenudge)**


End file.
